Collared
by OmegaHybrid
Summary: Madara's eyes glittered down at the boy who lay beneath him whimpering. No matter what the boy decided they were now his to deal with as he pleased. The seals carved into the cuffs on the teen's wrists would make certain of that. Dark AU, VENT
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Collared

 **Rating:** R

 **Warnings:** Slavery, Non-con/rape, Dub-con, Shota/Underage, General Abuse, Substance Abuse, Violence, Characters with Issues, Triggers, Muryoku Clan, Fuinjutsu Bullshit, Sharingan Bullshit, General Angst, Genderqueer Characters, Probably Bad(Incorrect) Japanese/Romanji, Alternate Universe

 **Pairings:** Forceful Madara/Obito

 **Summary:** Madara's eyes glittered down at the boy who lay beneath him whimpering. No matter what the boy decided they were now his to deal with as he pleased. The seals carved into the cuffs on the teen's wrists would make certain of that. Dark AU, VENT

 **Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, except for the plot.

 **Notes:** Welcome to the dark side of fandom, where good guys turn bad and we all write porn and other inappropriate things. Also, this will probably be the only note for the entire story(aside warnings, and venty explanations), so yeah, all those warnings and pairings are for the entire story. So thus what the endgame is going to be and everything. And this is my first ever time venturing forth with such a thing. So Ugh, it's probably going to be incredibly crappy. And awkward, and weird, and well...

Also, the characters are likely going to be a bit OOC, but that's because this is quite clearly an _Alternate Universe_. This portrayal of Madara is very clearly not what he is in canon same with all the other characters. As an aside, getting Madara's voice right is incredibly hard, he always feels a bit off in my fics. Timelines are likely to be more ignored than usual and several aspects of canon(such as Madara's death) are probably going to be removed entirely.

Enjoy, I suppose. You weird people(Also, this is kind of partially maybe a vent fic...)

Edit 28/5/2017: Moved to this profile, because I don't want my vent beside my actual fics. Also for other more awkward reasons. The original was posted back on the 18/9/2015.

Also as another aside, this portrayal of Madara is far removed from most of my other portrayals aside just being removed from canon. Which has justifications, but I'm not really going to go too far into the schematics of how this particular Alternate Universe works.

* * *

Obito knew that he should have just gone with Kakashi, but he'd still felt the need to tell the old man exactly what they could do with their plan. Now he was really regretting that decision, slammed up against the wall of a cave kept there by those strange root vine things that the old man could control. It did not help at all that the only thing that covered his body was the blood splatted cloak and his rather torn pants.

He shivered as the man stalked forwards to him, sharingan glowing menacingly in comparison to the darkness around them. He whimpered and lowered his head slightly, instinctively fearing making any sort of eye contact. It wasn't just due to the sharingan that Madara had either, but everything in his body was screaming for him to get away.

Except that he couldn't, his body was pinned to the wall. The man was close as well, too close. With a dark grin they leaned closer to him, he could feel their breath on his face and it terrified him.

"I'm afraid, you don't have a choice" the man whispered, the words barely echoing throughout the cavern. That was also the moment that he felt a sudden and sharp pain in both of his wrists. He jolted and stiffened unable to see what had caused the pain. He just knew, knew that something horrible had just occurred. "You still have a life debt to repay."

The man then sank back into the shadows and disappeared, allowing him to drop down to the floor. He whimpered single good eye slipping shut as even more pain shot up his arms. When he opened his eye back up he caught a glimpse of one wrist, and the cuff that rested there. Immediately his eye shot open in horror.

No, no, it was impossible. Yet the carved metal didn't magically disappear when he grasped it with his other arm. In fact the other arm hosted an identical cuff. The markings may have been unfamiliar to him, but that was the last thing on his mind in those moments. He now wore cuffs, it made his entire body tremble.

The man was serious, with an absolutely horrifying plan. The idea of putting the entire world into a genjutsu was pitiful. It wouldn't solve anything, it would only offer an escape. Fleeing reality wasn't his style, not really. Yet here he was trapped with the crazy old man who was serious about using him as a pawn to change the world using that plan.

He swallowed fingers tracing the carvings and body trembling. This would not be fun.

* * *

"AGAIN!" the command made him flinch automatically before he nodded his head. It had been a few months since his refusal of Madara's offer. A few months since the cuffs were applied to his wrists and the 'training' began. He moved his hands through the signs as quickly as he could, not applying any chakra because he wasn't expected to. "AGAIN!" not fast enough apparently.

He winced but repeated the signs, the pattern repeated several times more before Madara was finally satisfied. That didn't mean that the session was over though. Instead now he was expected to add chakra into the technique. He expected burns, and harsh words. He still wasn't the best at executing jutsu.

He quickly sped through the hand seals anyway before stating aloud "Katon: Endan" it helped him to focus. He's able to make a couple of the fire bullets before the technique sputtered out and failed. He coughed a bit, before glancing over at his captor. The man didn't seem displeased, but then again he didn't really seem all that pleased either. It was hard to tell since the man gave no reaction at all.

That unnerved him more than if the man had given a reaction. At least then he would have been able to tell whether he should try to duck down and cover his head or not. Slowly a smirk began to wind across the man's face and he felt the distinct feeling of relief. Which quickly disappeared as Madara's gaze narrowed on him and that same command was barked out once more.

"Again!" He sighed and obeyed.

* * *

Obito sat curled up in the corner of the cavern. Madara was missing for the moment, he didn't know where the old man had gone. He didn't really want to know either, because for at least a little while he was going to be completely alone. Alone in the cave, without needing to worry about the old man watching him. It was as much of a relief as it wasn't because it left him bewildered about what he could even do.

He didn't even have any clue what there was to do, because for the most part the cave was completely barren. Empty of absolutely anything that he could have used to entertain himself. Well unless he wanted to try _that_. He shifted in his corner and shivered, even the thought made him faintly uncomfortable. In this place it was just wrong, especially because those things were still watching.

Sure he was still relatively familiar with Guruguru, but it was a bit hard to trust any of them since they were mostly under the control of the old man. So he's unsure how much he can trust them. Sure once they were something like friends to him, but now it's much harder to be entirely sure that he can trust them. Madara created them, thus Madara controlled them.

It left him with incredibly few options of what he could do. He could have easily practiced some of the jutsu that the old man had been teaching him. Except that he was rather tired, still sleep eluded him. There really wasn't much that he could do at all, apart from training or lying around waiting. So he instead remained curled in his corner and tried to imagine himself back home and safe in Konoha.

The ghost of a smile flickered over his half scarred face before it faded. Those dreams simply fell into dust with old wounds breaking through them. His wrists faintly throbbed and his eye was drawn back to them; to the cuffs. Konoha, home was just a distant memory really. Freedom a wish that was forever going to be just out of his reach. The cuffs weighed heavily on his wrists; and his chest ached.

He rose one arm and reached out into the looming darkness of the rest of the cavern. If he imagined hard enough he could almost see someone coming to his rescue. Maybe his sensei, or Kakashi, hell even one of his stuck up Uchiha relatives would be a welcome sight. As long as they weren't one of Madara's other pawns.

Except of course no one ever came. Not even in his dreams, because he only seemed to ever have nightmares. Rin's death on repeat, or worse images that haunted him. His own little rampage to eliminate the Kirigakure shinobi. Sometimes in his dreams they were replaced with the faces and figures of people who he recognised from Konoha. His arm remains stretched into the darkness, and he closed his eye.

All that he could feel in the darkness was wet, slick, liquid. His arm dropped back to his side before he looped it back around his legs and drew his knees back to his chest. His eye opened once more and he looked down at his hand; clean but the feeling remained. He should have extended his left arm rather than the right one.

Even though it was merely a phantom sensation, it was still there. Even though he wasn't the one who had plunged his arm through someone else. No that was Kakashi, with the Chidori. He'd seen that move in action, both from the sidelines and... And through the eye that he'd given the other boy. The phantom images were repeats of that sensation, the glimpses of Kakashi's own experiences.

He shivered again before moving to look down at his chalky toned right hand. The cuff on his wrist gleamed even in the darkness but that wasn't what he was looking for. It was clean, there was no crimson dripping blood on it. He sighed, relief almost palpable. His hand was clean, clear of any blood. Yet it didn't entirely help, because the images were still there.

A clear memory of his arm through someone else's chest, of falling bodies and a bloated moon looming overhead. And then his dumb choice, a moment of stupidity when he should have waited for Kakashi to awaken and then left with him. Or awaited for the probable backup from Konoha. Instead he'd felt the need to explain to the old man his choice.

It was Kakashi's memory mixing with his own that made it all the more painful. Yet as he recalled that he began to wonder how Kakashi was even doing. So he closed his single eye again and focused. Breath in, breath out. He felt desperately for the faint connection that drew back to Kakashi. As soon as he found it he pulled...

* * *

...The first thing that he was consciously aware of through the connection was the killing intent being felt. It was nothing that he'd ever felt before, not even from the old man. It almost sent him right back into his own mind from the fear of the sensation. But he forced himself to remain in Kakashi's head. Forced himself to observe.

The second thing that he was aware of was the barrier that kept Kakashi and the other's of their generation from actually leaving the section that they were in. The barrier that kept them from the fight against whatever was creating such killing intent. As he watched through the connection he could feel Kakashi's frustration, and anxiety at the entire situation.

It seemed that even Kakashi wasn't immune to everything. It also made him incredibly nervous, because what was even going on. He couldn't tell even through the connection, and eventually Kakashi tugged down his headband and then Obito could only see darkness through the connection. It actually made him panic a bit because what was going on over there?

He couldn't tune into Kakashi's other senses, so all that he had to rely on was what he could feel from Kakashi. The other boy's emotional state, and if they ever pulled their headband up, what he could see through that eye.

It's terrifying to be unable to see even the smallest thing that's going on at Kakashi's end. It was made even worse by the emotional state that Kakashi was in, the panic, fear, frustration and desperation. All of them spun together into a dizzying concoction that made him apprehensive and worried. And the killing intent that was strong enough that he actually could feel it through the connection. What could possibly make such killing intent?

It freaked him out even as he allowed the darkness that he was able to see through the connection embrace him. As he allowed it to keep him from the sheer loneliness of the cave. From boredoms own embrace, and the fear that Madara would return at any moment. It was a distraction, but he really wouldn't want it to be anything else.

He spent a seemingly endless period of time simply floating in the darkness and feeling Kakashi's frantic emotions before they finally calmed down. Kakashi was relieved, but still worried about something. At least, at least the killing intent was gone. Settled, and sure that Kakashi was safe he pulled back...

* * *

...He was still alone in the cave. That didn't relieve him at all. But it did allow him some time to think. Or it would've if he hadn't yawned suddenly incredibly tired. Not that he wasn't often tired recently, but it was still annoying. With a mumbled complaint to no one in particular he shifted position and closed both of his eyes.

He might as well rest while he still had the chance. After all, everything was fine... Right?


	2. Chapter 2

_It's dark, so dark and he's running. Feet pounding against dirt and rock. He's not entirely sure where or why he's running but he knows that he has to move. He has to be fast and keep going, he knows that if he stops then that will be the end. The darkness suffocates him, clinging to his body and he can't even see his own limbs._

 _It's almost a relief because it shields him as much as it limits him._

 _He can't see, doesn't have to see and look behind him at the monster. At whatever, or whoever is stalking after him. The darkness offers him that comfort at least._

 _Broken laughter echoes and he almost winces as his feet suddenly lurch. What seconds before had been solid ground now slooshed around him at his waist. A light blue shine reflecting ripples and he could see._

 _He blinks and struggles to keep moving. Momentum is almost completely gone. He reaches desperately to the figure across the cavern from him. Even as the water sucks at his body and drags him lower._

" _Kakashi!"_

 _There's a cracking sound and he sees the other boy turn mismatched eyes wide. Before they can offer any other response there's a final harsh tug and his head is under water._

 _He's drowning desperately reaching with his left arm trying to breech the surface. Or grip the pale hand that reaches for his own. A hand clamps down on his shoulder and he opens his mouth releasing bubbles as he's dragged ever further down._

 _Back into the darkness that he'd only just escaped..._

* * *

"WAKE UP!" His eye snapped open and his head slammed into the rock behind him. He hissed and both arms moved to clutch at his head before he moved so that he could look at the man who had demanded that he awaken. It took all of a single moment for his mind to register that the man looked different. Younger than they usually did. That was actually kind of terrifying and he shifted backwards and away from the man.

Only, he wasn't able to go far at all because of the cave wall. And the man's arms moved to keep him boxed in against it. It made him increasingly nervous, because whenever the man in front of him trapped him or cornered him pain generally followed. Whether the pain was caused by the seals or the man actually hitting him though varied. Either way it was always pain.

The look in the man's eyes was not helping. Clearly they were furious, and he was the only one within range of the man's fury.

He could've attempted to escape. He could've used his kamui, but the thought had barely crossed his mind before it disappeared with the memory of the cuffs. The memory of the last time that he'd tried to escape using that particular technique. Flashes of pain, agony and visions of burning buildings and smoke, hands slick with blood.

He flinched.

Madara's furious expression changed in that moment, slipping to a smirk that oozed malevolence. And then Madara's hand was moving and on his cheek. His smooth and unscarred left one. It made him shiver a bit, before completely stilling.

The touch was too gentle. He blinked his single eye everything in him screaming that he should run. Get away while he still could. Except that the chance to possibly escape was already long gone. Had been for the better part of the year. Had been since Rin's death and his stupid decision really.

He didn't like being touched much anymore.

Especially not like this... Although what this was he didn't really know. Madara's hand and fingers ran over his cheek and he whimpered a bit. The man's smirk widened as their hand lowered and slipped over his chest. It made him tremble, because no... He closed his single eye as the man's hand ran over his chest.

He wanted so desperately to be back home, in Konoha with his team, his family. Rin-chan, Kushina-nee, Bakakashi, Minato-sensei...

He could feel tears as they gathered at the edges of his eyes and heard the laughter of the man keeping him captive. It only made him tremble more.

"Scared?" the man's voice is soft and he could almost believe that it was gentle but he knew that the man was anything but. It was clearly a taunt and he opened his single eye looking up at the man. "Good." his eyes narrowed and he shrunk back a little bit. It was the wrong thing to do as Madara's eyes narrowed and before he could react he was slammed against the wall.

Hard.

He yelped and struggled to find the ground, which was no longer under his feet. His arms both came up to claw at the hand that held him by his neck pinned to the wall. He choked and gasped desperately trying to simply breathe as the man laughed. Madara's eyes, glittered as he grinned at him.

When he was released he slumped over desperately sucking in the air and coughing. He choked and blinked bleerily up at the man who was frowning again. Glaring down at him. Madara's fury was quite clearly still present and that terrified him. Was the man going to activate the seals? Or was he going to continue with the physical assault? He didn't know and that just made it worse.

"That sensei of yours really is quite the thorn in my side..." Minato-sensei, Madara was referencing Minato-sensei. And it made Obito even more nervous and scared, because the tone that Madara was using was one that did not mean anything good. He slid backwards a bit, only to find a vine wrapping around him. He gulped as Madara's eyes narrowed on him once more. "I can't do anything to him... But, harming you will be enough." Madara smirked closing the distance between them. "After all how devastated would they be if they knew that you were alive? If they knew that the more they fought the more pain you'd be in..."

The man's voice was barely above a whisper, but it didn't need to be and he got the implications within seconds. His eye widened and he stared aghast at the man keeping him prisoner. His face drained of it's colour, because clearly the man was planning on taking his anger out on him.

It was going to get worse.

"How horrified would they look when I reveal that to them." the man smirked moving closer to him, hand once more stroking his unscarred cheek. "It would be the moment of absolute triumph, wouldn't you agree?" Madara's eyes lit up as the smirk stretched into a sharp pointed grin. All that he could do under the look was tremble, because he had a really, really bad feeling that this time the harm wouldn't be as simple as adding to his scars, whether they were mental or physical.

The promise in that look told him as much. As did the wandering hands over his body.

"Please..." his voice was barely above a whisper as he bowed his head and closed his single eye bangs falling over his face. "Please... Just let me go home..." It wasn't really a question as much as it was a desperate plea that he'd repeated at various times during his stay here. Since the application of the cuffs really. Since his freedom had been snatched away, because truly, honestly that was all that he wanted.

He only wanted to go home, and really if the man just let him... He'd probably remain completely silent about the events that had happened here. About what the man had bragged to him... Except that there was no chance of ever going home. Madara laughed bringing his head lower, closer to his ear.

Madara's breath tickled his ear and he shivered. The man was so close there was barely any space between them.

What was Madara planning now?

It was nothing good that was for sure, but then again nothing that happened here was good. Even the training was more of a form of torture pushing him to the very brink of chakra exhaustion each session and then barely allowing him enough time to actually rest and recover his reserves. It's no wonder that he always felt so exhausted. Emotionally, Physically... Just exhausted.

And now he could feel the man's hands as they ran up and down his body. What was this? He'd never really been in this kind of situation before, although it stirred some faint memories of lectures, lessons from his grandma. Warnings and..

He struggled trying to push the man away from him. Except that he couldn't really move, still wrung out from his not-quite-sleep. His eye snapped open and he squirmed, that only seemed to amuse the man more and he heard a chuckle by his ear.

"Worried?" the word was barely above a whisper and he whimpered especially as one of the man's hands ran over a particularly sensitive area of his body. "Don't be, I won't kill you." As if that was a relief. In all honesty though he was pretty sure if he could kill himself he would, there was a minor problem doing that though.

Namely the seal over his heart.

The Kinkoju no Fuda, which meant that the seals on the cuffs were more of a power show than really necessary. Just more humiliation to let him know exactly what kind of position he was in. To keep him on the leash, to keep him from even thinking of escaping.

He shivered as one of the man's hands rested at his hip. The other hand had come back up to rest just beneath his chin and the man tilted his head up. It forced him to meet the man's gaze. He wanted to close his eye and look away. He shifted trying and failing to squirm free of the root that held him there.

Madara licked his lips and moved a hand over his cheek once more. A thumb stroked lightly over his skin and he swallowed a hollow feeling in his stomach.

He didn't like how gentle the touch was. It contrasted with the anger that he could still see buzzing just under the surface in Madara's gaze. It contrasted with the monster that he'd grown familiar with trapped here. It made him try to pull back and away, out of reach of the hands.

Except that he couldn't. So instead he closed his eye again and tried to duck his head. Tried to hide behind his bangs and shield himself as best he could.

Madara wasn't having any of that though and he felt the tightening of the man's grip on a single arm and the hand on his cheek had moved back to beneath his chin.

"None of that now..." Madara's voice is like silk he thought. It's so smooth, and yet that's deceptive. He loathed it, hated it so much and his eye opened back up weakly glaring. The man continued to simply grin and then leaned down he could feel the man's breath at his ear now. "I'll make sure that you enjoy it."

That did not help at all. Enjoy what? What is it that the old man has planned? In fact the statement terrified him more than anything else that had happened up to this point. He really didn't want to enjoy whatever it was that Madara had planned. If he enjoyed it then it would be the equivalent of giving up. Handing victory over to the man, so he struggled, weakly, uselessly. But it was at least something.

Even if it only caused the man to laugh.


	3. Chapter 3

**Warning:** Rape takes place in this chapter! If that makes you uncomfortable feel free to stop reading or skip down to the line that begins with "All that Obito..." thankyou.

* * *

Obito struggled weakly against the vine that wrapped around him and kept him pinned to the wall as Madara continued to laugh and gently stroked his cheek. The man didn't even have to exert any effort really, the vine keeping him pinned quite thoroughly. It also didn't help the way that the vine occasionally tightened or loosened around his body. It felt weird, like the softness in Madara's touch.

This whole situation made him uncomfortable. He really wished that he were safe and at home. Madara's grin sharpened and he could feel it as the man's hands moved off his face and stroked gently down his sides. He wanted to shut his single eye again, but he knew that would likely just make Madara angry again so he only squirmed.

Unshed tears burned and he swallowed trying to push Madara away only to find his arms caught and twisted up and over his head. He tugged weakly and uselessly as the vine crawled over his body. He didn't like anything about this situation. It was uncomfortable and Madara was not supposed to be gentle, the man he'd come to know during his imprisonment was not gentle. Why was Madara younger anyway? Probably some other Kinjutsu or Juinjutsu...

Either way it wasn't helping him now. Because it only served to really drive home that he was powerless.

"P-please... please don't..." he whimpered as the man's hand moved lower and to his waist, playing with the band of his pants. He really didn't want to know what the man was planning. "P-please..." He yelped as Madara smirked and tugged on his pants. "St-stop! Please... Please..." he pleaded feeling air brush his now exposed lower half and almost half crossing his legs to shield himself.

Madara frowned momentarily before running a hand back up and over his chest. He squirmed a bit more even as Madara played with him. And the man was playing with him, purposefully being gentle, with light and soft touches that tried to excite him... His body was responding to the touches as well. He could admit that much. Even as the tears burned and slid down his cheeks, it was a mixture of shame, horror, and fear that caused them.

Yet most of him shivered, and arched under the man's touches, craving more.

He loathed and adored it at the same time.

He'd arch towards the man and then squirm trying to escape within the same moments with his heart and mind screaming no but his body screaming yes. It burned and made him feel sick even as he felt the hands gently rub over him. And then he felt something else. Something down lower and poking at him. He wasn't looking down. He refused to look at Madara either. So he simply stared at the wall eye unfocused as he felt Madara play with him.

Maybe if he avoided focusing on what was happening he could pretend that he was somewhere else entirely.

Pain shot through him and he yelped as something was suddenly inside him. He couldn't ignore that. He couldn't especially not as the vine tightened and Madara's other hand tightened on his side firm enough to bruise. He whimpered feeling it as the man allowed himself to press down on top of him. Madara's mouth was near his ear again and he shivered trying to move his head away. Except he couldn't and he could feel it as the man nibbled on his ear.

As the man poked something inside of him, and then a second something joined the first and he gasped. It hurt, it hurt and yet at the same time it felt surprisingly good. His eye squeezed itself shut and he could hear it as Madara chuckled right in his ear.

"I told you that I'd make sure you enjoyed it right?"

He choked on a moan and tears as a third object joined the first two. Distantly he realized that they had to be fingers. They had to be Madara's fingers, pushing and playing inside of him. It still hurt, but less now. There were pulses of pleasure that his body kept sending that made him question why he was fighting against this. If it was so enjoyable then why... But he couldn't...

He grit his teeth together and hissed trying to avoid thinking like that. That was bad thinking.

Bad thoughts.

"S-S-Sto... Plea-se, st-op!" he whimpered a fair bit breathless and half gone in a haze of the different sensations. It was as if his whole body was awash with feeling. Madara chucked again, more amused now it seemed than he was earlier. "No... ngn... ahh. Pl-ea-se... St-to-op!" Yet he heard a whine escape his throat when the man stopped moving the fingers within him. When he removed them and the vine released him.

He dropped to the ground and opened his eye back up confused, relieved and wary all at the same time. He didn't have enough time to get used to it though before Madara was on top of him now using his body to keep him pinned. He could also feel something larger than the fingers poking at his bottom.

"Come on... Stop fighting and this will be that much easier for you!"

He hissed when he felt Madara's mouth rest on that spot where his neck and shoulders connected. That was sensitive and another moan passed his lips along with tears. He could feel Madara's smirk as the man pushed, and then he screamed. It was worse than the earlier pain, he was been torn. He pushed and then slammed his hands down on Madara. His nails scratched and he could feel his legs uselessly kicking. Tears trailed and soon ran out leaving him soon simply breathing out, mind and body still buzzing with pain.

It didn't help that Madara was gently shushing him, running hands gently over his face, caressing him as if to sooth.

He didn't want comfort from his tormentor.

He couldn't talk at all as the man moved, in, out. He tried to ignore the feeling. To ignore the weight and everything single eye staring unfocused up at nothing as his body washed with mixed pleasure and pain. It was horrible, so much that he didn't want. It was numb as he felt the man finish inside of him. Burning hot liquid that dribbled between his legs and made him feel dirty. The fact that his own penis still throbbed didn't help. The man frowned and noticed and then gently tugged on it a few times until he also spurted.

Madara gently pet him on the head a couple of times afterwards and then walked out of the room. It was so clear that the man was proud of himself. Pleased with the damage that he'd done.

All that Obito could do afterwards though was stare blankly at the white that mixed with the red and stained his pale legs. At the marks on his skin that would become bruises and slowly he shifted and looped his arms around himself curled up and wept. Dry tears, all used up during the event and a weight in his throat. The cuffs on his wrists throbbing like weights dragging him down even further.

He hoped that he'd never have to go through this again.

Yet somehow when he raised his head, he got the feeling that he likely would. At least... At least he hoped that it wouldn't happen again anytime soon. Now though, now he just had to clean up. Clean both himself and the small section of the cave that had been messed up. It was important to leave no evidence after all... And it would probably help him sleep just a touch easier if he didn't have to see it.

So he struggled to clean it up. Focusing only on scrubbing at the red and white mixture. And trying not to think about what created it. Trying not to think about what had happened to him. It wasn't worth thinking about, he couldn't think about it.

It ached and it tore at him, but he refused to think about it. He couldn't think about it because that made it hurt more. So instead he scrubbed at the dirt and ignored the burning and the ache. The bruises that littered his form and the memory of how it had felt. Pleasure mixed with pain. He hissed and closed his eye shaking his head messy and long hair whipping around and making a noise that took his mind off it for a handful of moments.

Maybe, maybe to stop thinking about it he could just drift.

He sniffed and wiped one hand over his cheek faintly surprised when it came away wet with tears. He had thought that he'd already run out of tears to cry by this point. It would seem that he hadn't. He sniffed again and dropped the sponge that he'd been using to mop(ineffectively) at the mess that had been made. It was an even bigger mess now, a mess of mush and mud. So he pulled in on himself and shook. It hurt, yet it didn't.

He was just numb he realized. Past the point of feeling pain, and somewhere in the range of acceptance. This was apparently to be his lot in life it seemed.

He closed his eye tightly and took a couple of choked breaths. He couldn't clean up, he couldn't clean the mess, he couldn't clean himself. He couldn't do anything but sit there. And it tore at him, gripped him and squeezed. He wanted, he wanted his sensei. He wanted his _family_ or those who he called family anyway. Names tumbled from his lips as he curled in tighter on himself.

"Rin... Kakashi... Kushina-nee... Minato-sensei... please... someone, anyone... save me..." Tears trailed down his cheeks and he eventually threw his head back and just screamed into the solitude of the cave. The man wasn't likely to still be around. "Help! Help me please! Someone! Anyone... Please help me... Don't... don't leave me here without any idea why..." his head lowered back down and he stretched out a hand. "Why am I here... Why is this happening... Please... please explain... help..."

Eventually there was nothing left for him to say and he just fell into silence with the darkness leering at him. It wrapped around him and maybe a small part of him was comforted by it as he weakly got back to his feet and stumbled in the direction of what served as his room. The bed he once woke up on was still there and he looked around the cavern with a vague sense of safety. It was mostly detached though as he stumbled over to the bed and then flopped down on it. He curled up on his side and tugged the thin blanket over him and closed his eye curling hands into the sheet and sniffing.

It didn't really help but the familiarity of the room and the comfort of the bed gave him the illusion that maybe it could go back. Or at least he could pretend that it would go back. Back to when he'd still been healing and recovering listening to Madara's stories and joking with the artificial beings.

He sniffed one last time and then opened his eye back up. He wondered what had happened to the beings anyway. Honestly, it had been a fair while since he'd really seen or interacted with them. After Madara's turn around he'd kind of ignored them, or lashed out at them. He got the vague sense that they were still around but he never saw them. If he called for them now, would they even respond? Or more likely would they ignore him the way that he'd ignored them.

He winced and pushed himself into a sitting position only to almost jump when he saw an unfamiliar silver haired man sitting on what used to be Madara's throne, or vague approximation of a throne anyway.

He stiffened at the sight of the stranger single eye wide. For the moment it seemed that the stranger had no idea that he was there, more focused on the scroll that was opened in front of them and he hoped that it would remain like that. Slowly he inched backwards and off the bed planning on sneaking out. He didn't want to come into contact with anyone quite yet. Not so soon after his experience.

Yet before he could make any kind of getaway the man let him know that he'd been spotted with a simple statement:

"And just where exactly do you think that you're going, chigo?"


	4. Chapter 4

He stiffened and fought the urge to simply bolt at the voice of the stranger. Slowly he turned back around to stare at the stranger. Who rested with a single hand on their cheek and a curious unfamiliar expression on their face. It made him feel something, but before he could focus on the feeling it was gone and he was back to feeling rather empty. He felt his stomach twist and he wanted to disappear. He wanted to sink into the ground and cease to be there.

The stranger arched a brow and then stood up. He backed away, several steps. The man paused and tilted their head before walking forwards towards him. He backed away again, arms raised just slightly in an instinctive move. The man actually laughed a bit, it sounded... strange. Like the expression that the man was wearing. Not quite right and he didn't understand why.

He didn't understand why the man was here, or why he'd been hurt. He didn't understand anything. Sure he was past feeling pain, but that didn't mean that he wasn't going to feel confused, apprehensive and other such emotions. Especially around a stranger who was just there. Who was weird and had expressions that he couldn't quite place.

So he backed away from the man, he tried to keep his distance, only stopping when he felt the rough texture of the caves wall. Crumbling dirt and dust on his back. He curled in on himself and rose his arms up to shield his head. He lowered his head and closed his single eye tight avoiding looking up. Avoiding seeing the stranger who he was now alone with. At least Madara was familiar to him.

Dangerous, scary and dismissive but familiar. Even with the added strangeness of the man's actions earlier.

"Calm down chigo." the man's voice was so loud in the silence of the cave and he curled up even tighter. Maybe if he remained curled up, and kept his eye closed the man would eventually grow bored and leave him alone. Leave him to his solitude and numbness. Leave him to deal with what had happened to him. "Come on chigo... I won't hurt you... I'm trying to help you"

He couldn't help it. He snorted. As if the man wanted to help. No one wanted to help him. No one even cared that he was here. No one knew that he was alive as Madara had told him, even if it would be oh so tragic, so horrible if they did. He was nothing, nothing, useless. He couldn't even defend himself or fight back against his captor earlier. The man here didn't want to help, he was just saying words. Trying to get him to drop his guard, well... he wasn't going to fall for the honeyed words.

He could hear it as the man got closer, as they shifted and finally sighed as though defeated. He heard the footsteps retreat a small distance away and then completely stop and then he heard someone bark out a command. To a familiar name...

"Oi! Shiro! Where the... There you are, go get the med-kit." He couldn't help it, he rose his head ever so slightly and peered with a single narrowed eye as the man bossed around the oh so familiar artificial being. The man's mannerisms were also faintly familiar to him, but he couldn't quite place from where as the man glared at Shiro. "Well go on then!" the man shooed the being with barred teeth "go and get me the med-kit!" and then the man turned back to him and he ducked his head back down and closed his eye again.

There was no need to let the man know that he'd been watching. Although, seeing Shiro again, it made him feel strange... It wasn't that he missed talking to the being, although there definitely was a touch of longing in that vein. But... he didn't know.

"Come on chigo... it's alright. It'll be alright." the man stated voice now much softer, gentler than it had been initially. Too soft almost, too gentle and he felt himself stiffen. There was a familiar sound and he rose his head again in time to see the return of Shiro. The being seemed to feel his gaze as it returned his gaze and gave a grin in his direction. He felt a faint pull at his own expression in response before the man knelt down and again tried to coax him out of his ball.

"Come on Uchiha-chan! Kengeki-san is only trying to help!" Shiro stated happily. The being sounded no different than he did before. They sounded the same, happy, cheerful and obliviously friendly. "Kengeki-san is only going to fix your cuts and bruises. He won't do anything that you don't want him to!" Shiro stated and slowly, slowly he uncurled and he looked from the being to the one who was being called Kengeki.

"Promise?" his voice was so quite, barely a whisper on the breeze.

"Promise!" Shiro stated with a thumbs up and the man seemed to roll his eyes from beside the being before offering what should have been a reassuring smile. Obito blinked and then slowly he nodded his head and allowed the man to get closer to him. He still tensed as the man reached towards him though and almost bolted as the man's hand gently touched his shoulder. That wasn't, that wasn't allowed.

"It's okay, it's okay chigo... look, you're not hurt!" the man's voice was still soft, gentle but he found his eye closing as he shook his head. "Look, I'm only putting ointment on see..." the man stated and he opened his eye to watch as the man gently rubbed ointment into his wounds. "Now let's see about that ankle... I noticed that you were limping earlier..." As soon as the man's arms reached anywhere lower than his waist though he stiffened and pulled his legs up to loop his arms around them and hide himself a bit more.

"No... it's fine... I'm fine..." he muttered as the man blinked surprised.

"Chigo... you know I'm not going to touch you anywhere you don't want me to..." the man stated expression just faintly off, but he didn't know how, or why. "But, I do need to check that ankle, and you need to get properly cleaned up..." he shook his head, he didn't want the man checking anything on the lower half of his body. Yet still he slowly uncurled after they sat there for a few minutes. The man once more reached for his leg and he tensed.

The man only poked around his ankle though, and that hurt and he could feel more tears burning at the edge of his eye. The man gave a smile, though it still felt off and then pulled out some bandage wraps. Gently, so gently the man wrapped them around his ankle. Once the man was finished he sighed and stood up.

"Well, I suppose that's all I can do... There's a bucket of water, a sponge and a towel over there for you to use to clean the rest of you up" the man stated with a point and then he turned and left. Obito blinked and watched him go before looking over to Shiro. He was... appreciative that the being had stayed there honestly and found himself limping over to smile at the being. And then he dealt with the remainder of the mess that stuck to him. Except that he felt as several points that he wasn't quite getting it.

He wasn't sure whether or not he minded the fact that Shiro was still there. Eventually he gave up and decided that he'd done enough trying to clean himself up and looked over to Shiro... he debated his next action in his head until he finally sat on the bed and called to the being.

"Shiro..." his voice was still so quiet, yet the artificial being seemed to perk up when he called it and bounded over. Eager and happy, somewhat like a puppy really. He couldn't help it, he actually smiled a bit. "Shiro... I'm sorry for ignoring you and Guruguru..." he mumbled and the being momentarily seemed to frown before ruffling his hair much to his annoyance.

"It's alright Uchiha-chan! Don't you worry about it, we understand. You had a lot to deal with!" Shiro stated and he blinked up at the artificial being feeling his lip wobble and tears burn at the edge of his eye. "Why don't you sleep for a bit Uchiha-chan? Don't worry, I'll be right here to watch over you..."

"That sounds... that sounds nice..." He admitted wiping away the tears and giving a smile to their being. A forced smile, but still a smile. He yawned and tugged at the cloak that he snagged before curling up on the bed and, then he slept.

* * *

Obito later awoke in the same room, alone. It wasn't unexpected but still a flash of hurt shot through him and he wrapped his arms around him to hug himself. It wasn't that he'd really expected Shiro to still be there, but there was still a small part of him that had hoped. He closed his single eye and took a couple of deep breaths trying to stop himself from crying.

"Oh stop your sniveling!" he jolted and snapped his head up to stare at the one person who he really didn't want to see. Madara. The man still looked as young as he had the last time that he'd seen the man, younger than he was supposed to be. As though he were in his thirties rather than ancient edging closer and closer to death's door. "Come on. There is no time for slacking!" the man clapped his hands together. "Back to training."

He winced but pushed himself up and to his feet. He ignored the sharp spike of pain through his lower back and left ankle. It wasn't important. Not when Madara was right there glaring at him disapproving. He also really, really didn't want to show any weakness with the man right there.

Weakness would either mean that the man would mock him, or would punish him with the seals for not meeting his expectations. Neither option was one that he was really looking forwards to after his experience from the previous day.

So instead he grit his teeth and forced himself to listen to the man as he lectured about the latest Katon jutsu that he was trying to teach him. Forcing him to learn really. He hated the man, he hated this place. But still he pushed that hate down, he didn't allow any of it to show on his face. He didn't want to give the man any reason to even think of using the seals, or even any other form of punishment.

He'd never been the best at Genjutsu though.

Sure over the course of his imprisonment he'd improved, but still for the most part he was kind of useless at them. He just didn't have the control to use them effectively. It wasn't his fault, he couldn't help it. Yet under Madara's gaze he pushed himself to do better. He tried not to fail, because failing would give the man a reason to hurt him. To take out his anger on him. So he followed the man's orders.

He forced his hands to go through the seals.

Tatsu, Tori, Mi, Ne, Saru, Tatsu, U, and a clap to complete it. _Genjutsu: Mai Homura Muma_.

He hadn't actually performed it for himself yet though. But he has experienced it for himself. The images of flames and fire blazing up, up and around him dancing and making him feel weird and sleepy, and also scared. So scared. He took a deep breath and shook away the images of flames, He shook away the fear and the scent of smoke and the feeling of ash and dust in his hair.

Instead he just focused on actually performing the seals. Repeating the pattern under Madara's glowing red gaze. Under the gaze that felt as though it were looking just a little too close at him now. Removing the robes that he'd ended up tugging on to cover him. It caused him to shiver just faintly. Ever so faintly, because that kind of gaze was somehow worse than the original gaze filled with disdain and derision that the man used to observe him with.

He never thought that he'd miss the dismissive looks. The ones that said that he was less than human, less than dirt. He never thought that he'd miss those, miss them like he missed the days when he was just healing and oblivious to Madara's grander plan.

"Why have you stopped?" he jumped a bit at the man's harsh tone and tried to remember where he'd been in the string of seals. "Useless..." the word was hissed out and he flinched. "Go back and start again!" Madara snarled and he obediently restarted the seven seals.

Tatsu, Tori, Mi, Ne, Saru, Tatsu, U.

He tried to ignore the man, he really tried to ignore the man because it just wouldn't be good to get distracted again. Eventually he couldn't do the seals anymore, his arms feeling too heavy and screaming in protest, so half way through the Ne seal he simply dropped his arms, closed his eye and panted a bit. Madara snorted in derision. He expected the man to do more but surprisingly Madara seemed to think that was enough. At least that was what he thought until he heard the man's remarks.

"Barely a handful of repeats and you're already tired warou! Useless." he actually felt something in him twist at the statement. Sure any time he failed the man was there with acidic remarks, to rub the failure in more. But something about this time just felt worse. "I can see why they never came back to look for you... Its almost a waste of time teaching you when you don't learn" and that hurt.

That hurt a lot. The reminder that his team had never really gone back to look for him. Additionally the fact that the man then went on to mock him. But it still achieved what the man wanted and he forced his aching arms to move, to make the seals. He could feel the man's smirk on his back, and then the man growled.

"Add chakra warou." he wanted to glare at the man but instead repeated the seals.

Tatsu, Tori, Mi, Ne, Saru, Tatsu, U, a clap. Though he didn't know who he was aiming the genjutsu at as he whispered it's name.

"Genjutsu: Mai Homura Muma" and he actually felt an ache, a twist. He didn't even have to ask to know. The jutsu had failed completely. It hadn't even begun to work. He felt his legs give out at that moment and just barely caught himself with aching arms and muscles that protested. Again he heard Madara snort in derision and slowly rose his head as he heard the man's footsteps approach him. He shivered at the man's expression before Madara simply shook his head.

"Pathetic. Keep practicing warou! I'll be back later to see if you can do it. And if you can't..." the man grabbed one of his wrists just above the cuff and he struggled desperately to not flinch as the cuff glinted in the red glow reflected from Madara's sharingan. The man released his wrist with a laugh and he curled up with his arm carefully cradled close to his body. The man laughed again and then walked away leaving him alone to continue training. To continue repeating a series of handseals and trying to figure out a genjutsu on his own.

His stomach rumbled. There was also that. He actually couldn't really remember the last time he'd properly eaten, not really. He knew that he had eaten bits a pieces, Madara did supply food and sustenance. Even if it usually tasted like ash and dust, or mould. Even if it was never quite enough to make him feel as though he were full, satisfied.

He curled up a bit and took a deep breath sighing. He would just have to ignore it-

"Hey!" he jumped and held his arms up palms facing the man who'd spoken half hiding behind his arms. "Calm down chigo. It's only me. I brought you some bread to eat, no use training on an empty stomach don't you think?" It was only Kengeki... He blinked and slowly lowered his arms before accepting the small roll that the silver haired man was offering.

The man gave a small smile and he eagerly tore off a piece of the roll in a single bite and began to eat. It was only bread, but it tasted better than the stuff that Madara ever spared for him. And he noticed with a small amount of glee, it was still faintly warm. So it was fresh. He looked up at Kengeki and gave the man a small smile.

"Thankyou" he said grateful before he finished off the roll and licked away what few crumbs there were from his hands. Kengeki laughed a bit, light and free from beside him and he looked up at the man before looking back down at the ground.

"Don't worry about it..." the man winked and then stood up. He reached after the man, but before he could open his mouth to say anything, or even grasp the back of the man's cloak... he was gone. Like dust in the wind, or the flame of a blown out candle. He blinked and then dropped his hand back down. Rapidly he shook his head and then he grit his teeth together. He had to practice now, he had to figure out how to do this jutsu.


	5. Chapter 5

**Warning:** Nightmares, Emotional Feedback, Allusions to Rape

* * *

Kakashi awoke screaming, and clawing with his hands at Obito's gifted eye. It was only Minato's quick actions, grabbing both of his hands that saved it even as the sharingan spun and whirled. The Hatake boy made a high pitched keening sound and struggled against his sensei's grip. Momentarily he felt strange, there was someone else and his arms... no Obito's arms, they were up behind his head and this was wrong.

This was wrong because the man was hurting Obito and all he could do about it was watch as he slept, watch as the man gleefully ran hands up and down and all over, Kakashi choked and when Minato released his arms he aimed right for the trashcan.

It didn't help to calm down his stomach but he would admit that he felt just a little bit better. He didn't know where those images came from though. The image of someone standing over Obito, hurting Obito, _molesting Obito._.. he didn't know where they came from. He didn't know where they came from or why he was dreaming these things. It was terrifying and confusing and one of the main reasons that he'd been pulled from ANBU. If it wasn't the dreams where he was killing Rin _(No, no, please no... he promised, he promised.)_ then it was these dreams. A dark cave, solid rock and the man who mocked and taunted, called Obito useless and pathetic and then molested and... and...

He gagged and found himself trying to vomit again. Only there was nothing left and that hurt nothing but air rushing up his throat as he choked on nothing.

"Kashi-kun?" He was going to hit Minato-sensei. Smack the blond man right in the face for using that childish nickname on him. Yet his glare was weak, it fell flat and he could tell by the way that the older jonin's expression continued to leak worry and sympathy. "Come on Kakashi, what's wrong? This is the third time this week."

"I just... I don't know okay sensei" he muttered as his stomach finally seemed to settle itself. He tugged his mask back up and over his face fixing it back in place. "I don't know..." he really didn't. The dreams, the one's with the man who was... the worst ones had begun just after that night. The night when someone had attacked the village. Attacked Kushina when she was giving birth...

He remembered that night vividly. The fear the panic, the scent of fire and ash and ozone. Screaming, terror and confused civilians. The barrier that had blocked him, and everyone else of his generation from helping. Kept them safe, kept them out of the fight. He'd hated it, loathed it, and yet he also remembered something else.

A feeling in the back of his mind. Like a hand on his back and on his shoulder. Silent, unseen support, a sense of curiosity and worry. Questioning.

He still didn't have an answer for what that might have been. Yet some part of him just felt like he already knew... That the presence was Obito. His well, friend maybe. He hoped that when they met again on the other side he could call the Uchiha boy that anyway. He hoped that when he saw Obito again there he'd be able to tell the other boy, to thank him properly. Yet these dreams kept coming, ever since that night. They made him sick, and he felt horrible about them. As though he were watching it happen and letting it happen. It was a feeling that he didn't like.

It made him want to scratch and dig, to tear out his gifted eye, or to tear his own skin away to get rid of whatever it was that crawled there and made him feel like he was invading some private trauma.

It made him hate himself.

"Kakashi... It'll be okay. We'll figure this out. Just remember though, they're only dreams." Minato-sensei's words didn't help. Because every time he had the dream, something told him that it wasn't... it couldn't be just a dream. But surely it couldn't be real. Obito had been crushed, completely crushed by those boulders. There was no way that he'd be alive, and if he were alive he wouldn't be... he would've come straight home. Kakashi truly believed that. Obito wouldn't stay in one place, he wouldn't get caught by such a man and he wouldn't... he...

Kakashi wiped at his face frustrated by the tears that were falling from his eyes. He didn't want to believe that little voice that told him that it was more than a dream.

Because if it were real...

* * *

Obito growled as he made the seven hand seals again and again. He'd been working on the same jutsu for a while now. And still its actual use eluded him. It was frustrating and he ground his teeth together as he continued to make the hand seals.

Part of his failure could have easily been influenced by his fear. By the memories that continued to swirl in his head.

By the fact he was still off balance.

He still felt weird, and it ached and tore at him. A howling beast at his back that he'd let that man have such power over him. He was a shinobi, _he was a shinobi_. The man shouldn't have been able to push him down and keep him there. He growled and wiped a hand over his cheek brushing away the small amount of tears there.

Frustration, anger and helplessness burned in him. And, shame.

Because he should have been able to fight back more. It burned, but at the same time, the cuffs, the seals gleaming against the metal. He knows that fighting wouldn't have done much to help. If he would have been allowed to fight it at all. The man would have been able to stop him at any time with just a single hand sign. Using the seal over his heart rather than the ones on his wrists.

They really were more a power show than anything else...

He wiped one arm over his face furiously. Before growling and reforming the seals again.

Rapid fire, and he was able to feel his chakra swirl before.

"Genjutsu: Mai Homura Muma!"

And he felt it ripple. The chakra hung in the air and there was one single moment when pride flashed through him. It was broken by a slow, almost sarcastic clap. He spun around single eye wide at the man standing there. Just barely visible in the shadows of the cave.

"M-Madara-aruji!" he stumbled over the statement, backing up just slightly. The genjutsu that he'd finally cast dispersing. The man simply smirked, dark eyes glinting and he swallowed. He tried not to squirm under the man's gaze. Tried not to allow his body to tremble, to shiver. He knew that he was failing. He knew it as well as he knew the amusement that the man took from his trembling.

"Well warou!" Madara stepped forwards, a seemingly indifferent look on the man's face. "It would seem that you can learn after all!" Obito wanted to scowl at the dismissive tone. But the cuffs a permanent warning and reminder stopped him. So he just winced instead. The man snorted at his reaction and he swallowed. An empty hollow feeling in his gut as the man stepped around and stood across from him. "Well, time for your next lesson!" the man says and Obito swallowed.

He was not ready.

Not so soon, he was now low, incredibly low on his chakra. So much practice with so many attempts to get it right. He wouldn't have enough chakra to use whatever jutsu the man wanted him to... and he swallowed dry mouthed. Maybe that was exactly what the man wanted. An excuse to push him down again, to punish him for yet more failure. It made him feel even worse. A coil in his stomach at merely the thought that was what the man wanted.

But he had no choice. So he only took a deep breath and tried to follow what the man was doing. Handseals, and words that were so distantly spoken that he might as well have been listening from under water.

But obediently he formed the same hand seals as the man and prepared his chakra. Ready to at least attempt this new jutsu. He was ready to at least try, even when he already knew that failure was the only option in this situation. He swallowed again, the faint feeling of moistness at the edge of his eyes. The burning of tears ready to fall. But he feels his chakra weakly rising up. Ready to use in the jutsu. He takes a breath as he finishes the handseals, before clapping his hands together and pushing it into the jutsu.

Surprisingly there's a bright burst, the flare of his chakra and the heat of the jutsu pushes him backwards just a touch.

That was, not what he expected. And he blinked before glancing back at Madara nervously. Madara looked at him with a frown before shaking his head. The man crossed his arms and shook his head. Obito shifted awkwardly, rubbing his arms. The tips of his fingers dig slightly into his arms and he can't quite look straight at the man. He managed the jutsu... kind of, and that's good? But the man certainly wasn't seeming to approve. His mouth felt dry and there was a dull throb in his head. His chakra's too low for this...

"Alright..." Madara finally said, leaning back just a bit and eyeing him with a speculative glint in his eye. "I am surprised that you managed that, but it's improvement warou." the man's expression sharpened, and he curled just slightly on himself. "But that was barely much more than a burst of embers! Not the impressive flare of fire that the jutsu should be! So you'll continue to work on it over the next few days until it's satisfactory!"

Slowly he nodded his head at Madara's words, the man grinned, sharp and predatory. Before the man spun on his heel and simply left, leaving the exhausted boy alone. Obito slumped the moment he stopped feeling Madara's chakra, frame trembling and the dull throb in his head had increased to a repeated pounding that made him feel just the slightest bit queasy. He curled up with his hands coming up to grasp at his head. Digging into his skull only making it worse. It still felt like it might have helped. In another situation.

His stomach rumbled distantly, and he let out a small moan at the empty ache. He was also still hungry, and he hadn't seen any hint of the kind silver haired man from that first day. Maybe he'd never existed. Had just been some kind of desperate dream. But, Shiro had referred to the man as someone separate at the time, and even afterwards. The plant beings had all at off-hand times mentioned him again. Still, he'd never seen the man since that day.

In fact, he got the feeling that he was never supposed to have encountered the man in the first place. He twisted his fingers into his arms and took a deep breath, ducking his head just slightly. It was just a feeling, he wasn't supposed to know. And that made him sure that if Madara got any hint of it he'd be in trouble. Or perhaps the stranger would be. He didn't know for sure. It was just a feeling, an instinct. He closed his eye and shivered, fingers digging deeper as his head pounded.

He needed to rest.

He needed to sleep and recover at least some more of his chakra.

He was far too low currently. His body wracked with shivers and trembles told him that. The pounding and acute pain in his head. The way his own grasp on his arms felt bruising and that he struggled to simply remember to breathe. If it had failed at least he'd have more in reserve. Because it wouldn't have sapped so much, it would have just recoiled a bit. Left him dizzy and dazed, but with just a bit more chakra than what he now has. Instead, it worked partially. And now he's left trembling and feeling so close to just falling apart. More completely than he already has.

He already knows that he's barely more than shattered pieces of his old self trying desperately to keep himself together.

Trying desperately to pretend that he wasn't as broken. That he wasn't on the verge of just giving up. Giving in. And letting Madara do whatever the man wanted with him. It would be so much easier than spending his days shaking and scared that the man would suddenly lash out at him. It would be so much easier... but his stomach turned over at the thought and he swallowed his mouth suddenly so much drier. He rubbed his arms and mumbled words that didn't quite make a sentence, or any kind of sense before ducking his head down.

He wasn't going to though. He wasn't going to hand himself over. He wasn't just going to give that man victory and... he sniffed wiping one sleeve over his eyes. He wasn't going to change his mind just because it was hard, and because it was hurting him.

He wasn't going to let the man win in that way.

It would be a betrayal.

"Th-those who b-break the r-rules are tra-sh... but th-those who aban-don their comrades a-are le-less than tra-trash..." he muttered into his arms. _He wasn't going to turn around and follow Madara's plan_. Even if it might stop the man from abusing him. He wasn't going to betray his own morals by turning around and following the man's insane scheme. Because that would mean fighting against Konoha and even more... He sniffed, slowly raising his head body trembling. Rin-chan wouldn't approve.

He was self-aware enough to know that she wouldn't want him to turn against Konoha or the world just because of something like this. He wouldn't let her death be meaningless, or to become some excuse. Or the abuse he was experiencing.

He was tired and broken, drained and scared. But he refused to let the man win and turn him into nothing more than someone who would blindly follow such an insane scheme.

And yet in moments like this, when his chakra was sluggish and near empty, and his chest heaved with each breath it was so, so tempting to just stand up the next time that Madara came in and say that he would do what the man wanted.

It was so tempting, when the cuffs weighed heavy on his wrists and his head throbbed with a constant pain, his stomach aching with a yearning hunger.

But he curled his fists just enough in the dirt and grit his teeth fighting back small tears. Because it was also in moments like this that he remembered how much he _hated_ the man for all of the pain. For all the fear, and the loss, for the longing for home. It was a painful feeling to, the _burning hate_ that twisted and wound its way through his body. Stabbing deep through his soul like a knife, and then spreading itself out, threading itself and twisting within him like a tangle of roots between a tree. It stole his breath and mind, making him want to just lash out.

To scream, to fight back. To slip something into Madara's food, like poison or _anything_.

Even though it would just turn around to bite him like a serpent. The cuffs glinted in the low light and he breathed out, deflating with the simple reminder of the metal. Slowly his fingers traced a couple of the symbols. He looked up, with a distant expression that wasn't quite anything.

Another breath out and he rested his head against the dirt wall behind him. Closing his eyes he simply breathed. It wouldn't hurt too much to just drift off now.

He could practice later...

When he had the energy and the chakra. When he wasn't ready to break.


End file.
